This week, The New York Times went deep on all the ways President Donald Trump has tried to obstruct justice in the various investigations into his potential misdeeds over the past two years. But as Stephen Colbert pointed out in his Late Show monologue Wednesday, “Most of the stuff in the article wasn’t even secret.”
“We knew about his flagrant attempts to stop investigations into what Russia did to our election,” the host said, noting that even the Times article acknowledged that, “Americans have lost track of how unusual his behavior is.”
“Please don’t do that,” Colbert pleaded. “Please don’t lose track. I just want to remind you that that mildly nauseous feeling you have is because for the past two years Donald Trump has been spinning you in a tumble dryer full of turd. It’s all lies!”
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“The president attacking his Justice Department, trusting Putin over his own intelligence community, calling the FBI a bunch of corrupt, deep state coup-plotters is not normal!” he exclaimed. “It is strange!”
On top of all that, Colbert recounted just a few of the tweets in which Trump has “repeatedly attacked the investigation, publicly calling it the ‘Russia hoax,’ a ‘witch hunt’ and a ‘Frankenstein jamboree,” before admitting, “One of those we made up.”
The Times characterized the “novel” defense from Trump’s lawyers this way: “The president has been public about his disdain for the Mueller investigation and other federal inquiries, so he is hardly engaged in a conspiracy.”
“That’s your legal defense?” Colbert asked. “He’s innocent because he’s not hiding it? Because I’ve definitely seen some dogs sitting proudly next to a pile of poop on the floor, but I’m pretty sure I know who’s guilty. Bad president!”