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10 Summer Schlockbusters!

Transformers was pulverized by critics, but is cleaning up at the box office. The Daily Beast ranks the highest grossing god-awful movies of all time.

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Jaimie Trueblood / Paramount Pictures

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel Director: Michael Bay Release Date: June 2009

“A pile of glittering junk!” —Joe Morgenstern, The Wall Street Journal

“An impossibly, incomprehensibly overlong and cacophonous bore!”—Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor

Box office:Domestic (to date): $201.2 million International (to date): $190.3 million

Terminator 4: Salvation

Starring: Christian Bale, Helena Bonham Carter Director: McG Release Date: May 2009

“It's brainless, it's soulless, and it gave me a headache!” —Chris Tookey, The Daily Mail

“A shambolic, deafening, intelligence-insulting mess!”—Tom Huddleston, Time Out London

“A mindless farrago of collisions and explosions!”—Evan Williams, The Australian.

Box Office:Domestic: $121.9 million International: $220.0 million

Angels & Demons

Starring: Tom Hanks, Ewan McGregor Director: Ron Howard Release Date: May 2009

“Catholic torture porn!” —Bob Grimm, The Tucson Weekly.

“A plodding, exhausting adventure!” —Jeffrey K. Lyles, The Maryland Gazette

Box Office:Domestic: $130.2 million International: $337.5 million

Fast & Furious 4

Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster, Michelle Rodriguez Director: Justin Lin Release Date: April 2009

“Jerkily edited car porn!” —Alistair Harkness, The Scotsman

“Feels like at least four hours!” —Lou Lumenick, The New York Post

Box Office:Domestic: $155 million International: $193.9 million

The Passion of the Christ

Starring: Jim Caviezel Director: Mel Gibson Release Date: February 2004

“A primitive and pornographic bloodbath!” —Johnathan Rosenbaum, The Chicago Reader.

“A compendium of tortures that would horrify the regulars at an S&M club!” —Jami Bernard, The New York Daily News

“A grimly unilluminating procession of treachery, beatings, blood, and agony!” —David Denby, The New Yorker.

Box Office:Domestic: $370.3 million International: $240 million

Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man’s Chest

Starring: Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Jack Davenport, Bill Nighy Director: Gore Verbinski Release Date: July 2006

“All the appeal of a seaweed sandwich!” —Anthony Lane, The New Yorker

“The very definition of water torture!” —Brandon Fibbs, BrandonFibbs.com

Box Office:Domestic: $423.3 million International: $642 million

Pearl Harbor

Starring: Ben Affleck, Josh Hartnett, Kate Beckinsale, Cuba Gooding Jr., Jon Voight, Alec Baldwin Director: Michael Bay Release Date: May 2001

“Bore-a, Bore-a, Bore-a!” —Desson Howe, Washington Post.

“Littered with low points!” —Joe Morgenstern, The Wall Street Journal.

Box Office:Domestic: $198.5 million International: $251.5 million

Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace

Starring: Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman Director: George Lucas Release Date: May 19, 1999

“So incoherent, so completely bereft of a grand adventure's surging thrills!” —Charles Taylor, Salon.

“The biggest letdown since the Clinton presidency!” —Andrew Essex, CitySearch.

Box Office:Domestic: $431.1 million International: $492 million

Night at the Museum

Starring: Ben Stiller, Carla Gugino, Dick Van Dyke, Mickey Rooney, Ricky Gervais Director: Shawn Levy Release Date: December 22, 2006

“Fun for the whole family? Probably not!” —Jeff Pevere, Toronto Star.

“All the warmth of an Ice Age fossil!” —Thomas Delapa, Boulder Weekly

Box Office:Domestic: $250.9 million International: $322.8 million

Sex and the City: The Movie

Starring: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon, Chris Noth, Candice Bergen, Jennifer Hudson Director: Michael Patrick King Release Date: May 2008

“The crack of rock-bottom giving way to a whole deeper layer of magma! —Rick Groen, The Globe and Mail

“Made me laugh out loud precisely once!” —Anthony Lane, The New Yorker

Box Office:Domestic: $152.6 million International: $257.4 million

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