On Monday night, Jimmy Kimmel dedicated his late-night monologue to what he called “Episode 2 of CSI: I Can’t Believe Donald Trump’s Not in Jail Yet”—otherwise known as the Jan. 6 congressional hearings.
Trump’s bizarre decision to “reject the advice” of members of his team and declare victory on Election Night, despite even Fox News saying he’d lost, allegedly came from “an apparently inebriated” Rudy Giuliani.
“Apparently inebriated—which, by the way, is the title of Rudy Giuliani’s biography,” joked Kimmel. “Rudy Giuliani told him to go out and say he won. The way that you can tell Rudy is drunk is his breath smells more like booze than cigars and cat turds for a change.”
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The allegation that Giuliani was a drunken mess was backed up by former Trump aide Jason Miller who, when asked whether there was anyone that night who “in your observation had had too much to drink,” replied, “Um… Mayor Giuliani.”
Kimmel couldn’t help but laugh. “OK, so Rudy was drunk. The big question is: What’s Donald Trump’s excuse? He doesn’t even drink! I mean, this testimony from his lawyers, his staffers, his campaign advisers, his own family—there are really only two options here: Either Donald Trump was lying and committed multiple crimes trying to strong-arm an election, or he’s off his freakin’ rocker. I guess it could be both.”
When Trump’s son-in-law and senior adviser Jared Kushner was asked during his testimony if he’d ever shared his perspective on Giuliani’s drunken plan with the president, he stammered and responded, “Um… I guess… Uh… Yes.”
