Title: Creative Director at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 78½
His Usual: Canadian Club Whisky on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: Sally fixes him French toast with rum (Episode 9)
Drinking Buddy: Himself
Drunkest Moment: The weekend after the Clio Awards, he drinks so much he forgets which day it is, wakes up with a strange waitress—and still has a little hair of the dog.
Best Bon Mot: When Joan asks him for his drink order, Don says: “Make it simple, but significant.” (Episode 6)
In the Season 4 premiere, Don’s housekeeper remarks that he never eats, and there have been similar warnings every week for our tragic hero. (Even a prostitute refuses a drink with Don because she needs to get to dinner with her family.) Don’s sunk so low he usually doesn’t bother with mixers now—or friends. He drinks in the company of coworkers, reporters, dates—but many times, he drinks alone. He drinks after his slighted secretary Allison trashes his office. He drinks Smirnoff with Roger. He drinks an Old Fashioned at Benihana with Bethany. He drinks beer at home. He drinks sake and Chianti with Faye. Most prominently, he drinks bottles and bottles of whisky in the office. Don Draper never met a glass he didn’t want to empty.
Title: Partner at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 33
His Usual: Vodka (Smirnoff or Stoli) neat
Most Creative Drink: Gibson Martini
Drinking Buddies: Don Draper, “Joanie,” himself
Drunkest Moment: An all-martini lunch with Don in Episode 6
Best Bon Mot: “Have a drink,” he tells Joan. “It’ll make me look younger.” (Episode 5)
Although the rest of the office prefers brown liquor, Roger almost exclusively drinks vodka—whether neat, on the rocks, or in a half-dozen martinis. In Episode 2, Roger has to lie down and swig Maalox after a boozy lunch with an executive from Ponds cold cream. He drinks a Gibson martini at a bar near Keens Steakhouse to “fortify” himself in Episode 7 and has another Gibson at his favorite diner with his favorite redhead, Joan. He drinks before, during, and after the Clio Awards. And we’re treated to a flashback of a younger Roger and Don in Episode 5, which shows their deep-rooted love of James Bond’s favorite cocktail. “Let me buy you lunch,” Don says after plying him with martinis. “I’m stuffed,” Roger replies. “I had a jar of olives.” Roger’s weakness for the clear stuff transformed Don, the fur salesman into Don Draper, creative director.
Title: Partner at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 14
His Usual: Whiskey on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: 3 whiskey sours ordered at the Playboy Club in Episode 10
Drinking Buddy: Don Draper
Drunkest Moment: His entire New Year’s Eve “man date” with Don in Episode 3
Best Bon Mot: “[My father] is one of those alcoholics who thinks that he’s collecting.” (Episode 3)
A welcome addition to the ad agency’s partner roster, English financial officer Lane fit in seamlessly with the American lushes. He even saw a new side of Don after they were both working in the office on New Year’s Eve. Lane broke out a top-shelf bottle of whiskey (a birthday gift from his father), which they marveled “had no bite at all.” The two finished it off by sneaking a flask into a monster movie, followed by more whiskey at a restaurant, a mug of beer at a comedy show, and a Canadian Club nightcap before spending the evening with hookers. ( Tally ho, indeed.) Lane seemingly spent the rest of the season recovering.
Title: Partner at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce and works in Account Management
Total Drinks This Season: 11½
His Usual: Whiskies (all types) on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: Bottle of Champagne after learning his wife Trudy’s pregnant
Drinking Buddy: His father-in-law
Drunkest Moment: Any time he’s alone in his apartment
Best Bon Mot: Surprisingly, Pete doesn’t get mouthy
Our young accounts man is all grown up. Now that Pete’s a family man, he’s rarely out carousing, instead drinking Crown Royal whiskey and Glenlivet Single Malt Scotch at his bar at home. In Episode 4, he does drink at the office with Harry, pouring a jigger of Glenlivet while complaining about Ken Cosgrove. Later, he orders Dewar’s on the rocks to steel himself before telling his father-in-law they’re dropping his account. Once he finds out Trudy’s “with child,” they order up the bubbly. In Episode 12, he refuses a drink from Don, only to go drown his sorrows in the privacy of his own home.
Title: Copywriter at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 10½
Her Usual: Whiskey on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: Manhattan
Drinking Buddies: Don, Stanley, Joyce, Abe
Drunkest Moment: Wallowing after her breakup on her birthday
Best Bon Mot: "“You need three ingredients for a cocktail. Mountain Dew and vodka is an emergency.” (Episode 8)
Peggy’s a trailblazing career woman, and her sense of ambition doesn’t stop at the bar. After the simpering Mark breaks up with her, Peggy heads to Don’s office for some Crown Royal on the rocks. Later,when they’re at “someplace darker,” Peggy’s seen sipping a Manhattan—exactly what her Brooklyn-born mother was drinking at Peggy’s thwarted birthday dinner. She also drinks at the Christmas party and tries to invent a Mountain Dew cocktail with the artist boys. But most tellingly, when Peggy’s future boyfriend Abe tries to order Johnnie Walker Black, it’s Peggy’s confidence that gets the bartender’s attention.
Title: Senior Vice President of Account Services at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 9
His Usual: Whiskey (whatever’s around) on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: White wine
Drinking Buddy: Harry Crane
Drunkest Moment: Midnight whiskies in the SCDP office
Best Bon Mot: “Give that to El Jefe,” he says, and passes a Canadian Club to Don. (Episode 8)
Ken’s the even-keeled type who didn’t overdo it this season. He’s comfortable at the bar—even at Don’s—and pours plenty of the brown stuff for his fellow ad men. When Don is trying to sober up in Episode 8, “The Summer Man,” it’s Ken’s peer pressure that kickstarts the afternoon imbibing. As with most characters this year, Ken drinks more as the agency’s future gets cloudy. In Episode 11, after white wine with his fiancée and future in-laws, he heads to the office to commiserate the loss of the Lucky Strike account with Pete, Roger, Bert, and Don. Whiskey on the rocks for everyone.
Title:Freelance Artist
Total Drinks this Season: 8
His Usual: Whiskey (Jameson) on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: 7 and 7
Drinking Buddies: Stanley and Jane’s cousin Danny
Drunkest Moment: He couldn’t have been sober when he crossed Joan
Best Bon Mot: His caption on the lewd illustration of Joan and Lane: “Tally ho!” (Episode 8)
Initially, this cocksure young artist fit right in at the office, swigging Jameson Irish Whiskey in the Season 4 premiere. But Joey soon grew too big for his britches, and even asked Joan to fix him a 7 and 7 in the sixth episode. Her cool response: “You have legs.” Joey also drank bottles of Budweiser with his creative compatriots and tried to invent a Mountain Dew and vodka cocktail. When more drama with Joan reared its head, Peggy canned him, and poor little Joey spent half the season drinking at home.
Title: Consumer-Researcher who works with Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 6½
Her Usual: Whatever they’re pouring
Most Creative Drink: Two glasses of sake
Drinking Buddies: Don Draper
Drunkest Moment: Goes home too early to tell
Best Bon Mot: “I don’t know how you guys drink like this around here. I’d fall asleep” (Episode 5)
Earlier in the season, Don’s blond love interest drank to fit in at work, knocking back a few at the Christmas party and at the post-Clio Awards celebration—but, she always headed home before Don could seduce her. After the two share a bottle of sake from the Honda executives (a first for both of them), the future couple seems to have a deeper connection. Three episodes later, Don orders Chianti for them on their successful first date. In Episode 9, after an awkward encounter with Don’s daughter Sally, Faye has half a whiskey and refuses to make one for Don. No matter—he finishes hers.
Title: Office Manager at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks this Season: 5
Her Usual: Vodka (Smirnoff) on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: Bloody Mary
Drinking Buddy: Roger Sterling
Drunkest Moment: Joan doesn’t get drunk
Best Bon Mot: “You’ve crossed the border from lubricated to morose,” she tells Roger. (Episode 6)
As the calm matriarch of the office, Joan’s rarely seen indulging in shenanigans; more often, she’s offering to fix pick-me-ups for everyone around her. When Ms. Blankenship dies, Joan beelines for Roger Sterling’s office and pours two neat vodkas to soothe the pain. When she does grab a bottle of hooch, it’s always in the company of her silver-haired paramour—never once with her husband. During a flashback in Episode 6, Roger gives her a fur and they share a cocktail in a hotel room. Those were happier times. Later, as she and Roger discuss an abortion, a Bloody Mary is spotted on the table in front of a pregnant Joan.
Title: Don’s Ex-Wife
Total Drinks This Season: 4
Her Usual: Vodka Gimlet
Most Creative Drink: Vodka Gimlet
Drinking Buddies: Henry Francis
Drunkest Moment: Too many vodka gimlets
Best Bon Mot: “You need a drink?” Henry asks her. “You’re not allowed to say that.”
The eternally childlike Betty managed to sneak in a few drinks during her relatively little screen time this season. She’s seen with red wine in the premiere episode, but it is Thanksgiving, after all. Betty’s one true moment of booziness this season comes in Episode 8. She and her new husband run into Don and his very blond, very young date, Bethany, at a restaurant. To cope, Betty hits the gimlets a little too hard and has a drunken spat with Henry on the car ride home. She also drinks red wine with her spaghetti dinner at home. Seemingly, Betty’s slowing down—her marriage to Don must have been driving her to drink.
Title: Head of the Media Department at Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce
Total Drinks This Season: 3
His Usual: Whiskey (whatever’s around) on the rocks
Most Creative Drink: Chivas Regal Blended Scotch Whiskey
Drinking Buddy: Ken Cosgrove
Drunkest Moment: Intoxicating the executives from Life cereal and spoiling Peyton Place
Best Bon Mot: Never gets drunk enough to become funny
You, sir, are an embarrassment to Madison Avenue. The bespectacled head of the television department made a truly pathetic showing this season. He asks Joan to track him down coffee and grapefruit juice in the season premiere, despite Pete telling Peggy that Harry gets a case of top-shelf liquor each month “for sticking his nose up some guy’s ass at NBC.” Harry did throw back a whiskey at Jim Downey’s Steak House in Episode 4, and sucked down something brown after the Philip Morris meeting was canceled in Episode 12. But compared to the other guys, this Harry drinks like a Sally.
