Season 4 of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City has been nonsensical, outlandish, dark, disturbing, and outright unhinged. Suffice it to say, it’s an all-time best Housewives season.
From “rumors and nastiness” to “sound bowl” meltdowns, the cast’s dynamic has radically changed not only season-to-season, but within the same episode. RHOSLC is a rich, chaotic game of Clue with mysteries and betrayals aplenty.
As we hurtle toward the finale of this classic season, it goes without saying that all the film noir ladies of RHOSLC are winners. There may be an Ultimate Girls Trip airing, but the all-star cast on Bravo is in Salt Lake City. With the season finale airing Tuesday night, it’s time to dive into who’s sitting atop the cast totem pole, starting with the top and ending with who’s buried beneath the ice.
Heather Gay
Heather Gay suffered a vicious fall from grace last season, with the Bravop fanbase cannibalizing their once-relatable queen as she blindly sided with Jen Shah and shrouded herself in the bizarre mystery of her black eye. But Heather is more powerful than ever now that her murky layers have shown.
Between her cemented seat next to Andy at the reunion and her new-found alliance of terror with Lisa Barlow, Heather’s in the strongest spot she’s ever been in. Without the anchor of Jen Shah, Heather has navigated the group more strategically. Avoiding conflict in the first half of the season, Heather successfully rebuilt relationships with Whitney and Angie K. And now that she’s in the mud, she has the upper-hand in her war on Monica, barring another self-destructing performance at the reunion.
Lisa Barlow
Lisa Barlow’s volatility knocks her down a peg, but she’s clawed her way to the top of the group through sheer force. Heather may be the mascot of Salt Lake City, but Lisa is the leader. When she says jump, her sycophantic followers ask how high. Even Monica has ended the season seeking Baby Gorgeous’ approval.
Things looked especially dire for Lisa midseason as she suffered fallouts with Angie K and Whitney, and relentless attacks by Monica, but somehow, she slid herself right out of trouble. This may end up her most comfortable reunion yet, a true testament to Lisa’s ability to bulldoze her way out of accountability.
While she’s always on the verge of a feud with half the cast, Lisa’s friendship with Heather and peace treaty with Meredith have made her bulletproof—for now.
Meredith Marks
Had you asked me two years ago, I’d have said Meredith runs the group, even if the show’s promo materials have never centered her. But the group’s approach to dealing with Mother Marks has changed quite a bit over the four seasons. While they tiptoed around her early on, desperate for approval, Season 4 has made Meredith into a punching bag.
Nothing exemplifies her shaky standing like the Bermuda trip, where almost all the ladies killed her husband during a game of “marry, fuck, kill,” a day after the entire group collectively denied Meredith of a bathtub while she was suffering a Vicki Gunvalson-esque travel illness—one Whitney insinuated was pill-induced. That came to a head when the entire group, sans Heather, pummeled Meredith for her alleged behind-the-scenes dealings at the Bermuda pirate dinner.
Yes, Meredith once had a Lisa Vanderpump-hold over the group, masking her shadiness beneath her elusive accent. But, unlike the passive women of Beverly Hills, the cast of RHOSLC have humbled her again and again. Still, Meredith’s strong standing is a testament to her icy ability to remain unshaken, but her days of puppet mastery are long gone.
Whitney Rose
Whitney Rose has blossomed. Season 1’s little sister of the cast has cemented herself as the cast pot stirrer. The Ashley Darby of RHOSLC, Whitney has transcended her initial role as Heather’s sidekick and found her voice within the group.
That said, she’s easily in the weakest spot of the OG’s, simply unable to confidently stand on her own. Whitney still rules above the group underlings Monica and Angie K, but Mary hit it on the head when she called her “little girl.” Between her embarrassing attempt at drama with Heather in Bermuda and her failed rally against Lisa—on top of her simmering feud with Meredith—Whitney simply can’t spar with the best of the ice queens.
Angie Katsanevas
Angie K. harbors an interesting role in the group. She doesn’t garner much respect and exists more as the cast jester, but over the course of the season, she’s covertly snuck her way up the ranks. She may always be Angie K.‚even with Angie Harrington and her elf-on-a-shelf husband banished to a harrowing life in the Vida Tequila mines—but she’s perfected the role of Housewives minion.
Entering the season a former friend-of who had to invite herself on the cast trip, Angie was stomped on by Meredith, Heather, Mary, and even Monica. But, like a spanakopita, this Greek goddess has many layers, and is ending the season on good standing with not only the cast, but the fans. Having wormed her way into Heather’s heart—and even attending one of Kathy Hilton’s many Christmas parties as Mary’s plus one—Angie has affirmed herself within the group. She’s not the star and probably never will be, but she’s a much-needed utility player.
Mary Cosby
Mary Cosby seems like one of the least strategic women to play the Housewives game, but her eclectic approach actually masks a master of the game. She may have ditched a reunion, declined to participate in group events and missed the cast trip—as well as BravoCon—but this child of God somehow makes it work.
Post-season, Mary has rallied behind Monica, an enticing prospect as the one cast member left on her side. What’s more, Mary has restored her relationship with Whitney and is seemingly friendly with Angie K. She’s unlikely to snatch her snowflake back—it’s hard to tell if she even wants it—but Mary has fought her way into the fold. And this time, no one’s accusing her of running the cult she obviously runs. That’s a skillful re-entry, one Taylor Armstrong could’ve learned from to survive another season on Real Housewives of Orange County.
Monica Garcia
Now, I know what you’re thinking. What is Monica doing this low? She has first seat at the reunion, she’s a fan-favorite, and much of the season has revolved around her. There’s no doubt Monica’s a star, but, if Angie K. is the tortoise, Monica’s the hare. Her star is burning bright and fast, yet as we hurtle toward the reunion, Monica has failed to build a genuine connection with the group.
Monica’s sure to be on an island of her own by the end of the Bermuda trip, a spot she’ll have trouble worming her way out of. While she has played the fans with relative ease, Monica forgot one of the most crucial aspects of Housewives: the need for allies. This scorched earth diva will have massive trouble escaping the hole she’s dug, her best bet being a Kelly Dodd-like run, but she’s on more of an Aviva Drescher trajectory, if we’re being real.
Maybe Monica will get advice in the off-season, as she desperately needs to learn how to stir the pot more tactfully. It doesn’t matter how much the fans love you when there’s no one left to film with.
