Seth Meyers torched the entire TV landscape during his incendiary closing monologue for NBC’s upfront presentation in New York, where the network previews its upcoming shows to advertisers.
Meyers’ opening joke set the tone for the barbed presentation, directly calling out the Federal Communications Commission, which has repeatedly targeted Trump’s media adversaries in the past year.
“I’m Seth Meyers—or as the FCC calls me, ‘Next,’” he began, according to Variety.
He quickly segued into roasting his network colleagues.
“CBS did not hold an upfront presentation this year because at CBS, upfront just describes how they paid Trump to drop the lawsuit,” the Late Night host said to an applauding Radio City Music Hall audience.
CBS announced its new slate of shows in April, ducking the usual May fanfare.
Meyers, 52, repeatedly targeted the MAGA-coded TV network, which settled a controversial $16 million lawsuit with Trump last summer before ousting outspoken Trump critic Stephen Colbert just weeks later. Simultaneously, CBS was being sold off to Paramount Skydance, owned by the nepo baby son of Trump megadonor and centibillionaire Larry Ellison.
“After over a decade, we have taken down CBS,” Meyers boasted. “Well, the Ellisons did, but I like to think we helped. Seriously, what’s going on over there? They’re so in the pocket for Trump that I heard next year Survivor is in the Strait of Hormuz!”
Paramount Skydance submitted a winning bid to purchase Warner Bros. Discovery for $111 billion. If they gain government approval, they will control both CNN and HBO, among other covetable properties.
“Paramount Skydance has announced that it plans to merge its Paramount+ streaming service with HBO Max. So now you’ll get all your favorites in one place. Plus Paramount+!” Meyers joked, before turning his scathing comedy back towards his own parent company.
“Comcast actually made a bid too, but no one thought we were actually gonna get it,” he said. Comcast “was kind of like that one friend who always pretends to reach for his wallet after the check comes, ‘No, no, Comcast, you can get the next time.’ ‘Thanks, I’m a little light after buying the NBA.’”
“NBC had it all: the Olympics, the Super Bowl. The more you think about it, the more it breaks your heart that we’re up here selling next year,” he said. “NBC has the Emmys this year. Well, we’re airing them. HBO is the one who actually gets to have them.”
“Speaking of streamers, Comcast said on its most recent earnings call that Peacock is approaching profitability in the same way Kevin Hart is approaching seven feet tall,” he joked. “But it’s an exciting time for Peacock. Season 8 of Love Island USA is set to premiere in June... That’s Love Island, the show President Trump calls, ‘I never went there!’”
The comedian found a way to get one last dig in at the president while presenting the new live-action Fast & Furious series for Peacock, saying that “due to rising oil prices,” Vin Diesel “now goes by Vin Ethanol.”
Despite the pointed jabs, Meyers will appear on CBS’s The Late Show with Stephen Colbert on Monday night. He and Colbert will be joined by their three network late-night hosts—Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Fallon, and John Oliver—in a group they dubbed Strike Force Five.
