Actor Sam Neill sat down with Australian TV show Australian Story on Monday to discuss how he’s “not really interested” in his battle with a rare form of non-Hodgkin lymphoma. “It’s out of my control. If you can’t control it, don’t get into it,” he said. The actor was three months into chemotherapy treatment when his tumor started growing again so doctors tried an experimental anti-cancer drug that turned out to be effective. While Neill has been in remission for 12 months, the novel drug requires infusions every two weeks and will eventually stop working, he revealed to Australian Story. He nonetheless said he’s “not remotely afraid” of dying. When that moment comes, he said, he’ll have “ten days in which I could not feel more alive or pleased to be breathing and looking at a blue sky.” During his chemotherapy, he couldn’t act or work in his New Zealand vineyard, so he took to writing about his life experiences in a book, Did I Ever Tell You This?, which was published in March.