Samantha Bee Begs Bernie and Biden Supporters to Get Along After Super Tuesday

Following “one of the most important nights in the 2020 election,” Samantha Bee spent Wednesday night’s episode of Full Frontal breaking down the “close race between Bernie, Biden and the coronavirus, which it projects to infect them all!” 

“As we know, the big winner of the night was Joe Biden,” the host said, attributing his unexpected success on the last-minute endorsements he got from former rivals like Amy Klobuchar and Pete Buttigieg, who “gave up his lifelong dream of becoming America’s white Obama.”

“It was all in the name of coalescing behind a candidate who is… fine,” Bee, who has previously expressed her discomfort with Biden, said.

From there, she moved on to roast the media coverage of Super Tuesday, including Fox News, which she thought “would be having a field day” over all of the “chaos” on the Democratic side. “But even their analysts had some issues,” she said. “Brit Hume was up at 5:30 a.m. to share a screengrab of election odds, forgetting to close his tab for ‘Sexy Vixen Vinyl.’”

Bee noted that the page in question was between open tabs for Hume’s bank account and the coronavirus, “which to be fair was every man’s id this week: My 401K, I’m horny, I’m gonna die.”

Later, the host acknowledged that the Super Tuesday results “were probably disappointing” for some of her viewers. “It may seem now that Democrats are more divided than ever,” she said. “This primary has become bigger than the candidates. It’s starting to seem like it’s about the very soul of the Democratic Party, a race between unapologetic progressive values and the color beige. But no matter who your candidate was in the beginning, we all need to come together in the end.”

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Bee concluded by offering advice to both sides. “If you’re a Bernie supporter and you end up having to vote for Biden, keep fighting to push the party to the left,” she said. “If you’re a Biden supporter and you end up having to vote for Bernie, I don’t know, man, enjoy legal weed when it passes and chill the fuck out!”

“At the end of the day, the most important thing to remember is that we have to defeat Donald Trump,” the host said to cheers from her audience. “And the second most important thing to remember is—and I cannot stress this enough—never invite Michael Bloomberg to your pizza party.”

For more, listen to Samantha Bee on The Last Laugh podcast: