After offering viewers a brief recap of all of the damning stories plaguing Donald Trump from just the past 24 hours—culminating with the president’s admission to Rage author Bob Woodward that he misled the public on the coronavirus—Seth Meyers shared the reaction from Fox Business host Lou Dobbs.
“President Trump today had a great day,” Dobbs told viewers on Wednesday. “A day that any president could only dream of.”
“Oh hey look everybody, it’s Baghdad Blob,” the Late Night host said in response. “I’ve heard of brown-nosing, but apparently Dobbs is in there so deep his hair turned brown. Normally when an old man says something like that you have to tell him, ‘Grandpa, Harry Truman is dead!’”
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But even more galling to Meyers were the lengths that Fox News hosts like Sean Hannity and Steve Doocy went to back up Trump’s claim that he was just trying not to “panic” the American people.
“Oh yeah, totally, Trump is the picture of calm and poise,” Meyers said. “He’s spent the last four years claiming that caravans of migrants are coming to kill everyone and airplanes full of mysterious black-clad thugs were flying cross-country to burn down American cities. He’s the human embodiment of yelling ‘fire’ in a crowded theater. Of course, nowadays you can cause a panic by yelling ‘crowded theater.’”
Then turning back to the president himself, the host said, “I’m so fucking sick of watching this guy try out every excuse until one sticks. You just know Trump’s the kind of guy who takes one bite of every chocolate in the box. ‘Are any of these filled with gravy?’”
“Also, the choices aren’t lie or panic,” he continued. “There’s a third option, where you tell people the truth and do something about it, which would reassure everyone. But no, we elected the guy who puts duct tape over the check engine light.”
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