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Steve Martin Nails Roger Stone on SNL: ‘Pardon Me!’

THE JERK

‘I'm just a normal and straightforward guy!’ the ‘Saturday Night Live’ vet insisted as Roger Stone.

After Roger Stone emerged from his federal indictment hearing and flashed Nixon’s double peace signs to the press on Friday, it seemed inevitable that he would end up on this week’s Saturday Night Live. But who would play him? SNL veteran Steve Martin took the lead in my informal Twitter poll and, like magic, there he was Saturday night.

“I’m like if those shorts with the little whales come to life,” Saturday Night Live’s Tucker Carlson (Alex Moffat) said by way of introduction during this week’s cold open. “Our top story tonight: President Trump’s heroic end to the shutdown. It took him 35 days, but he was finally able to get no wall.”

Over the course of the sketch, the Fox News host chatted with Cecily Strong’s Judge Jeanine Pirro—asked “How are you?” she replied, “A lot.”—and the consistently brilliant Kate McKinnon as Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross, who was asked about why he said he couldn’t “understand” why furloughed workers had to get food at homeless shelters instead of taking out loans.

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“Right, well, that was silly of me,” McKinnon’s Ross said. “I simply meant there are other ways of getting money. They could have liquidated some of their stocks, or sold one of their paintings. Even if they sold a lesser Picasso, it’s still going to get you through a week or two of yacht maintenance.”

But, of course, the major highlight came when Martin emerged as a bespectacled Stone, who told Carlson, “What a fun couple of days. I’m loving the ride. Go Nixon!”

“Honestly, I think I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life!” he added, failing to portray himself as the “poor, helpless old man” Carlson wanted him to be. In fact, at 66, he’s “almost as old as Sting.”

Asked how he plans to pay his mounting legal fees, Stone said, “I set up a donation page based on a phrase people everywhere have been yelling at me: ‘Hey Roger, go fund yourself!'”

“Pardon me?” Stone asked the host later. “Oh no, that wasn’t a question, I was saying that to the president,” he clarified. “Pardon me!”

And after Carlson said he’s sure Trump “appreciates your loyalty and your eccentricities,” Stone channeled Martin’s most iconic SNL catchphrase, adding, “Hey, I’m just a normal and straightforward guy. And live from New York, it’s Saturday night!”