“Look at Kamala Harris, Pete Buttigieg, AOC—the entire future of the Democrats is controlled by people without children. And how does it make any sense that we’ve turned our country over to people who don’t really have a direct stake in it.”–J.D. Vance
The whispers are growing and the stakes are too high to stay silent. It’s time to ask the question on everyone’s mind: Can J.D. Vance be an effective leader while parenting three children under the age of seven?
Having children is a beautiful choice for those who want them. Raising children is also a choice but it’s not always beautiful. It’s a time-consuming, occasionally terrifying process. Vance made that choice and said it was the best thing he’d ever done.
ADVERTISEMENT
“Some people tell me I’ve lived the American dream, and of course, they’re right,” Vance said at the Republican National Convention while introducing himself to the voters. But, he continued, “My most important American dream was becoming a good husband and a good dad, of being able to give my kids the things that I didn’t have when I was growing up and that’s the accomplishment that I’m proudest of.”
This speech was Vance’s interview for one of the highest positions in the United States government and he flat-out admitted that he was more into his family than his career. It makes you wonder if Vance even wants this demanding job. Or if like other Millennial men, he is embracing work-life balance.
Conservative men have long insisted that women can’t hold leadership positions while juggling family duties. Surely, the same must be true for Vance. How can we turn our country over to someone who doesn’t have the time, loyalty and attention to run it? Let’s explore the ways that juggling family and job could lead to dropped balls.
Split time
In 2023, Kamala Harris traveled to Germany, Ghana, Tanzania, Zambia, The Bahamas, Indonesia, the United Kingdom, and the United Arab Emirates according to the White House. Despite all this travel, the Vice President did not miss a single carpool, recital, or bounce house birthday party. It helped that Harris’ two stepchildren were already in their 20s when she and husband Doug Emhoff moved into the Naval Observatory. But Vance’s kids are still so young that if he became VP, he’d be forced into making tough choices.
In his memoir Hillbilly Elegy, Vance wrote about the pain of growing up with an absent father and a revolving door of stepfathers. In response to his own upbringing, Vance is keen on being a hands-on dad. He’ll want to eat dinner with the family most nights, teach his oldest son how to golf and shoot, and attend church weekly to instill his radical Catholicism.
The constant travel and demands of his job could potentially take Vance away from his family. Perhaps a hybrid work week would alleviate the pressure (but good luck getting his boss to approve that.) The negative effect of Vance’s absence could be irreversible, especially on his two sons. Without proper manly influence, what will happen to Ewan, 6, and Vivek, 4? Some have speculated that it was the lack of a father figure that drove Vance to seek the approval of German-born destroyer of websites and democracy Peter Thiel. By taking on the vice presidency, Vance may be condemning his own children to someday listening to someone like Thiel ramble on about “mimetic theory.” If Vance has a heart, he will not let that happen.
Split loyalty
Vance’s devotion to his family could also have grievous effects on public policy. For Vance, having “a direct stake” in the future might mean caring too much about not getting into war.
Imagine a scenario where Vladimir Putin decides to grab Alaska back and threatens to start bombing D.C. if the U.S. doesn’t comply. Vance might just hand over the oil-rich state to protect his children. Even worse for Republicans, he might stop denying climate change.
Or what if Vance is at the U.S./Mexican border, engrossed in separating Latin American kids from their parents seeking political asylum, and he gets an urgent message from his wife that one of their kids is sick. Will Vance be able to stay focused on the task of sending children into government facilities where many were sexually abused? Will he be able to set aside his cruelty to less-fortunate children at the border in order to race back and nurse his own?
This is speculation, but the odds of one of his three kids falling ill in the middle of a crisis is pretty high. Think of the possibility of ear infections, strep throat, and diarrhea cubed.
Split attention
Often women will show each other photos of their kids in the bathroom out of fear that some male colleagues will consider it unprofessional to put their home life on display. Blah blah blah who cares about your kids? But Vance is happy to bring them up in public. In his convention speech, he spoke directly to his “beautiful children” who were at a hotel. “If you’re watching,” he said. “Daddy loves you very much, but get your butts in bed, it’s ten o’clock.”
Is he going to keep wasting everyone’s time so he can parent? And is Vance going to take the same tone with Americans that he took with his kids—voicing his love for us before bossing us around and telling us what we should do with our butts?
In the past, Vance has admitted that parenting is hard and he struggles to control his temper. Blogging about his conversion in 2020, he wrote that he took his cues for being a father from Catholicism. He claimed it was Catholicism that “demanded that I treat my son with patience, and made me feel terrible when I failed.” He said it was Catholicism “that demanded that I moderate my temper with everyone, but especially my family.” And finally, Vance wrote, it was Catholicism “that demanded that I sacrifice professional prestige for the interests of family.”
There are few jobs in this country more prestigious than the vice presidency. If Vance is compelled to sacrifice that prestige for his family then maybe he should just stay home and let a childless cat lady run the country.
Nell Scovell is the author of the memoir Just the Funny Parts: And a Few Hard Truths About Sneaking Into the Hollywood Boys Club.
