Scouted

You Deserve Better Than a Sh*tty Umbrella

Always Ready

You could be rain-proof by this time tomorrow, thanks to the magic of modern existence.

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Photo Illustration by Scouted/The Daily Beast/Amazon

Maybe it’s that you never think about acquiring an umbrella in advance so you always end up buying one at Walgreens when it’s already started to rain. Maybe it’s because all the umbrellas you have ever owned were inherited from people who accidentally left them at your house. Maybe you get some perverse pleasure from stealing umbrellas from more prepared people in your office.

Or maybe—just maybe—you have some complex psychological condition where you truly believe that you deserve to get soaking wet during a storm and should not have nice, convenient things to prevent that exact scenario.

Whatever the reason, know this: It does not have to be this way. You do not have to suffer through another rainy spring with a subpar defense against the sky opening up above your head. You need not get waylaid by a canopy gone topsy-turvy in a gust of wind. There is a perfectly adequate, reasonably priced umbrella that could literally be on its way to you today.

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I know, because I too was once a person who always had a shitty umbrella. Then some time last year, after I turned up at a meeting looking like a shipwreck survivor, I remembered I was an adult in possession of an Amazon Prime account. A little light searching landed me on the Newdora Windproof Travel Umbrella.

It’s small enough to fit in my day bag; the sleeve isn’t so tight that I can’t get the umbrella back in once it’s out. On an especially windy days, the canopy stays strong and right side out, delivering on the “wind proof” promise. When I recently took it out on a wet slushy night and plenty of snow collected up top, never for a moment did it seem like the whole thing was going to collapse.

But maybe best of all: When you invest a whole $19 in an umbrella you really like, I have discovered you’re less likely to leave it places—saving you money on future panicked umbrella spending. So go ahead. Before April showers show up, treat yourself. May you never get soaked in a storm again.

Newdora Windproof Travel Folding Golf Umbrella
Offers a one-year warranty.

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